[A New Day Has Come, Celine Dion]

I'm not one normally rockin' the Celine, but ever since Twitchington made me cry dancing to the song on SYTYCD it's become one I rather like, from time to time.  It's very fitting to my life at the moment, so there you go :)

I am exhausted- EXHAUSTED.  Know this-- today I woke up, spent time in Jesus' word that spoke to me and was real (see today's post on Spiritual Foode), never once ate sinfully (again, today's post on the Foode Log lays it out in better detail), and I cleaned for almost 8 hours.  I have before and after pics, but I'm really tired and my first day of work (as a nanny!) starts in 9 hours and I really need to sleep.

My feet are KILLING me from being on them all day, but there is a change in me and it's real.  I know most of you probably feel skeptical, from all of my empty and broken promises I've made in the last 7 months, but today was Day 1 and the new Tami, who relies on Jesus and worships Him alone, is  here and she's staying.

There's much I want to write about, from the most amazing blessing from a generous friend today (seriously, I can't to tell you all about it!) to the free clothes I'm getting, and I want to share my pics of my gorgeous apartment, but since I'm so sleepy I'll end with this:

Tonight I spoke with Jas about setting some rewards for reaching certain goals.  Like, when I can fit into a size 22 (a full 4-6 sizes down) we'll get me a real swimsuit for water aerobics; we'll figure out something for under 300 pounds; and when I get under 250 pounds I will get a bike.

The conversation wasn't passive in nature, though that tends to be my style.  Rather, instead it was active: "When I get under 250 pounds I will get a bike."  And, suddenly, I had a vision of me a hundred pounds lighter and riding a bike, something I haven't done in literally 10+ years; being that I'm only 26 that's pretty sad!

This probably seems insignificant, but it was a moment of clarity that I don't think I will ever forget.  See, normally my visions of stuff like bike riding or even walking around Green Lake or riding the bus or not worrying about seat sizes are always of other people.  It's abstract... some other person who isn't me doing that stuff that I can't imagine being able to do.  This time, it was a vision of me doing something as a less obese version of myself and it was very concrete.

This is real.  I can do this.  I will rely on Jesus and the Holy Spirit to slaughter my idols and break this habitual sin.  I will have victory in Jesus' name and I will lose weight and be active.  I am doing this.  Cheesy as it may be, a new day truly has come.

Here's to day 2.